Pick Me! Pick Me!

Nobody liked it, right?  Everybody hated it.  Really, have you ever met anyone who loved the process of picking teams in gym class when you were in elementary school?  Heck, I don't even think the captains always liked it for fear of losing friends in the process of choosing. I can only imagine what Fred Savage would say about it "The Wonder Years". You remember the drill, don't you?  The teacher would give instructions. Everybody line up. Here's Captain 1 and Captain 2. Now pick who you want on your team.  I don't know about you but I was certainly not the first one picked for gym teams.  I was usually towards the end of the line.  I would have much rather been gabbing it up with my friends on the recess playground than play sports so needless to say, I wasn't very good.  How I got the "gym award" in high school is beyond me!  A story for another day...

But remember how you felt if you weren't top pick?   Awful.  Inadequate. Unwanted.

Simply put:  Not. Good. Enough. 

Today is March 10th.  Yes, just an ordinary Tuesday I suppose to most of you.  But to me, it is the anniversary of the day I was picked...FIRST. Sixteen years ago today, my husband proposed to me.  And since we will be celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary just next week, you can assume I responded with a resounding "YES!"

Among all the flowers of the garden, he picked me.  He chose to spend the rest of his life with me.  Little 'ole me.  But do you want to know a little secret?  I don't honestly think he completely knew what or who he was picking.  Sure, he proposed and said with that beautiful ring that he wanted nobody other than me and that he wanted to spend the rest of his days with me but didn't he know? Didn't he know I had baggage? Didn't he know there were too many flaws to count?  Didn't he know at times I would be hard to love?  Didn't he realize life with me would not be a bowl full of cherries?!?!  Frankly, my husband doesn't even like cherries!!!  No, he couldn't have known.  When we dated, we were more than honest about who we were and about struggles in our lives but no matter how honest one is with another, you don't fully know one another. I mean really, if you did, how boring would the rest of your days together be because the mystery was gone?!?!

The good, the bad and the ugly don't always show themselves until you are living this crazy journey together under one roof, in one covenant and one life together.

So today, I say to my husband: 

Thank you for picking me.  FIRST.  

Thank you for wanting me on your team.

Thank you for not kicking me off the team.  ...even when I might deserve it.

Thank you for picking me despite my inadequacies and failures.  

Thank you for loving me even when I am not lovable.  

Thank you for loving me even on the days when I am not a team player.

Thank you for not holding my baggage against me but for helping me to carry the baggage I bring into our marriage.
Thank you for choosing to walk through the difficult seasons with me.
Thank you for picking me to listen to...over and over and over again. 

Thank you for picking me even when I display characteristics that I never intended to display or never even knew I had in me.  
In picking me first, you have never made me feel awful, inadequate or unwanted.  You have never made me feel like I was not good enough.  

Thank you for picking me...ALL of me...the good, the bad and the ugly.

Happy Anniversary.

Just over this bridge is a bench.  A bench that not only stands near where such a historical event took place but a bench where a life began. A bench where one life picked another. And from that historical moment in our lives to this day, our two lives have been blending together to create a legacy for future generations.  One step at a time... 

Old North Bridge ~ Concord, MA

Dave got down on one knee in front of bench much like this one.  Yes, it was 16 years ago but the memory is still crystal clear in my mind.


What about you?  Is there someone you need to thank for picking you first?  Maybe your spouse?  Maybe a parent?  Someone who made you feel wanted and loved despite your inadequacies?